Journey to Me

OMG! It's been so long since I've posted. My last post was in February and it is now October, pretty much November. I don't even know where to begin! I've been through so much, it seems like the process never ends (not that I'd want it to!). I can say that I'm definitely making progress. So, here's an update. I hope I don't miss anything.

I am in my last semester of undergrad!!!!...!!!!! I am absolutely overwhelmed with life at this point. My classes are a handful, but I'm holding it down. I'm taking 12 credit hours right now, which doesn't sound so bad. I'm taking a class about Sustainability where I've had 2 group projects going on at once. One is done so far, the other will be done when the semester ends (thank goodness). We're working on seeing how we (the University) can use the Green Roof on the Physical Sciences building to grow native, threatened, and/or endangered plant species to preserve, protect, and reproduce them to replenish and beautify the campus. I'm also taking a class called Biology and the Environment, which I could take with my eyes closed. It's a 1000 level course that I'm taking as an elective. It's pretty interesting, though. Up until now, I wasn't familiar with Environmental Science at all. This class is pretty much an introductory course. I am also taking a Black History course to finish my minor. The professor seemed so intense and uptight at first, but she's really just a sweetheart on the inside. She's just really about her business!! We discuss some pretty interesting topics that cover the antebellum period in America. Finally, I'm taking a course called Capstone which is the exit course for the Interdisciplinary Studies major. I did say I changed my major, right? lol...

I'm graduating December 14th, 2012 at 2:30pm. Yes, Lord. Thank you! I can't begin to express how I feel about graduating after 4.5 l o n g years! I'm just so thankful for the support system that I've had in my family this whole time. It hasn't always been easy, but it's turning out to be very much worth it. All the tears and feeling homesick and lonely sometimes, it was all worth it. I'm not sure if I've mentioned this before, but I am a first generation college student, so I'm very proud to represent my entire family when I walk across that stage. I dedicate my graduation to my parents, grandparents, and older brother. WE have all arrived. And to my younger siblings and cousins, ya'll need to handle business now. I changed the game for you!

I am also working for the first time during the school year. I love and hate my job at the same time. I'm in retail right now and I love meeting new people and helping women look their best, it's just time for a change. I've been there since the end of March and I'm ready for something new. The pay sucks, but my 40% employee discount (that's right) is everything!! Can you say shopaholic?

 I am still dating the same guy. We've been together for over a year now :) I'm in love *swoons*!! I'm about to get mushy here, so if you'd rather be spared, then skip to the next paragraph. Anyway, I never thought I'd feel this way about someone. I've been completely open with him about my entire life, pretty much, which I've never done with anyone before. He looks like a big tough guy, but he's just a big teddy bear. He's so loving, giving, protective, kind, loyal, honest...I could go on and on!! Geez. Where had he been all that time before? How did we not cross paths sooner? He's been home with me a few times and met my family. My grandparents adore him. They always ask me when we're getting married. You know how old people are. "This isn't the 1950's, Poppy." That's what I have to tell him. lol... You don't marry the first person you seriously date these days. My grandparents have been together 49 years and my granddad is 73. *does a quick computation* He was 24 when he married my grandmother. Yea, people don't get married that young anymore either. Any who, I'm rambling. We're both 22 and just enjoying each other, for now!

My hair is growing! I decided not to cut it anymore. It's time for something new. My goal is to have a nice bob. I'd like to try the asymmetrical bob with a little color in it. We'll see how it goes. I'm smack dab in the middle of the awkward phase right now. I just don't know what to do with it. I'm about to try to make my own clip ins so I can give my hair a break from all the heat styling I do to it. I'm about an inch away from being out of the awkward phase. My make up is looking great these days, but that's a separate post! I'll update on all my new products soon!! (like I really have an audience, anyway) lol...

Oh, I moved into my own apartment at the end of the summer! Finally, room mate free! It feels good. I can do anything I want to, anywhere in my apartment, butt naked if I so choose! Yes, that's the best part of living alone. I've always spent a lot of time with my man so he's there with me more often than not. So, I don't get lonely. However, I do get super bored when he's not around! I live in a pretty nice community. I just go out and go for a walk around the park if I'm that bored. The people there mind their business, but are friendly enough. Okay so the biggest difference I've noticed now that I don't live in student housing is the peace and quiet!!! OMG, I think that's the best part. My last semester in student housing I believe my upstairs neighbor was a DJ. I'm not even exaggerating. The music was non-stop!! Where I live now is so quiet! I love it!

Well, I'm going to write a book if I don't stop here. I think that covers pretty much everything. Life is good, I can't complain! Just living it up!

♥ Dai

Journey to Me

So much has happened in the past 6 months! I'm feeling a little anxious that more changes are coming. I'm at a point in my life where I just would rather not deal with anything unnecessary. If it's not going to help me move forward, then I really don't need it in my life right now. I've been through so much drama, lost friends, I've fallen in love, and I'm still just trying to keep my priorities straight with school and accomplishing my goals so I can live my life. In the midst of all that, I'm feeling a little anxious and drained. I'm anxious for what's to come and drained emotionally of what has been. I just want to focus on being the best person that I can be for myself. Wow, I'm tearing up as I write this...I don't even know how to describe what I feel...I feel lost and I don't know where to find myself in all of this. Everything that's happened is a lesson learned and I just take the best from it and keep pushing forward.

I love me!

I think this is a pretty common topic for anybody across the board. It's really important to love yourself. I say that because although I am a very self-confident person, I realize that not everybody has that same confidence. Whether someone has made them feel bad about themselves or they are too critical of their own flaws, there are people out there, girls in particular, that struggle with self- confidence. I'm not saying that males don't struggle with this issue, I can just relate to it from a female point of view for obvious reasons...

We all have flaws, but what I learned while I was younger, is that you have to take those flaws and love them! I will use body image as a specific example. Everybody has something that they don't like about their body, even the most confident people. The difference is learning to love and embrace those flaws and becoming accepting of yourself no matter what. People want to change themselves so bad and there are billion dollar industries (plastic surgery) that feed off of those insecurities. What you have to learn is that your flaws make you who you are, they make you YOU!

If you can't love yourself past your own flaws, whether it has to do with your body image or just what you think of yourself in general, then no one else will love you. There are people out there who are so insecure about themselves that they feed off of others' insecurities to temporarily make themselves feel better and it's just sad. In feeling good about yourself, you give someone else the strength and courage to look on the inside and find something good about them as well.

We all need to find something positive about ourselves and let it shine. And the things we don't like, we need to take hold of it and just own it, learn to love it. When we do that, we free ourselves from our own limitations of what we think we can or can't do or what we should and should not look like. Every one, every body is different. Love yourself for who you are!

~LaDai

Busy!

It's been a super busy semester so far, already, and it's only the third week of class. I'm taking 16 credit hours this semester, which is the most I have EVER taken in one semester. My long-term goal of finishing school has turned into a short-term goal, as my graduation date is fast approaching. It seemed like it was so far off in the distance before, now it's within sight. It's kind of overwhelming at times, but I'm getting there. After my 5 classes this semester, I'll only have 7 left. So that leaves me with 2 semesters left before I'm done. I hope to finish by the summer of next year, so I'm working really hard to make that happen. I can't believe that I'm a senior and the 4 years have gone by so quickly!

I feel how I felt when I was graduating high school. It's so bittersweet that after all of this, it's coming to an end. I've met some amazing people and I know that we'll be lifelong friends. The whole college experience in general has been a good one, for me. I'm a little bit nervous about ending this chapter and starting all over. I know that whatever comes next will be a great experience, though. I'm looking forward to it!

~LaDai

Journey to Me

I was just thinking about independence day and what it means to me. I decided to brush up on my history and read about the historical importance of today: the American Revolution, the Declaration of independence and what it meant as far as solidifying the United States as an independent country. Then I made an important decision, I am truly proud to be an an American.

Saying this out loud sounded weird to me. I have probably only said this phrase less than a handful of times in my life (that I can recall): September 11, 2001, President Obama's inauguration,...and today. And then I thought about it. How many times have I said to anyone, "I am American"? I'm black, yes. But, American? I'm not so sure. Does the fact that I was born in America make me American? Sure. If I was born in Germany, I guess I'd be German. *shrugs* What does it truly mean to be American? The few times I can recall telling anyone I'm American was meeting a group of people from the Caribbean and the first question is "What are you?" (Jamaican, Lucian, Bahamian, etc.) I would reply (as I identified myself), "I'm black," and someone would politely say, "No, where are you from?" "Florida!" LOL...I never really thought of myself as American. That's not really what comes to mind first as far as how I identify myself.

I am American and proud!

Happy Independence Day !

Thanks to the men who were brave enough throughout the American Revolution to establish our freedoms...and the soldiers today who fight to protect them!!


I haven't posted in a while. I'm on so many different social networking sites (facebook, twitter, tumblr, this one..I think that's it lol), I figured I share enough of myself everywhere else. I've kind of neglected my blog, which is the one place where I feel like I can share my inner thoughts without worrying about a stupid character limit. Alot has changed and happened since my last post in April...

I talked about the change of major. I'm currently considering my options and trying to put together a plan for what I'd like to do after graduation in December 2012. I have recently opened up to the idea of teaching out of state. I have currently added Texas, North Carolina, and Georgia to the list of places I wouldn't mind moving to. I'd have someone I know, either family or a family friend, in each of those places. If moving can't happen for me, I'm working on making it a possibility to teach at the high school I went to. I've been trying to meet with someone to make sure I'm qualified and see what openings they may have within the next year or so. I'm realistic about the cuts in education and the fact that it may not be as easy as it sounds to get a job as a teacher. My dad proposed the idea of me joining the Navy, which I almost did right out of high school. I'm not opposed to that, but that option is only if I can't find a job within 6 months after graduation (gotta get those student loans paid!) OR if I do start teaching and maybe it isn't exactly right for me. The biggest pro for me about the Navy is that if/when I get my Master's degree, I have a sure way to pay for it without taking out anymore loans or living like a broke college student again. I just know that whatever happens after graduation, I'll be FINE!

I've also had ridiculous amounts of roommate drama. Living with friends can either go great or horrible. We've had some great times, but boy when things are bad, they're BAD. I don't really care to get into what happened.

I don't know what else there is to say. Life is good right now. Summer classes started about a week ago and are going well so far, despite how much work it is. No one said it would be easy. Once the summer term is over, I have 11 classes until I'm finished! It feels good to have come this far! This school year is going to be a lot of work. Depending on how I work my schedule, I could graduate as early as next summer. By December of next year, I'll for sure be finished!

As always, thanks for reading!

~LaDai

My Tumblr

I have started posting here http://vivalaladi.tumblr.com/ I haven't abandoned this blog, but for more frquent updates, that's where you can find me!